Hello friends and welcome back! I’m so excited for today’s blog post. I’ll be sharing one of my coaching trade secrets that has helped many women come out of feeling stuck. But before I do, I want you to know, I will do my best to address your questions, concerns and always try to put positive content here. As I read your comments, I realize that there are a lot of women here that are struggling. There were several questions about what to do when you are feeling stuck. That is something that many of my clients struggle with as well so I thought that I would address it today. There is an exercise that I have my clients do when they're feeling like they are unworthy, not good enough or just plain stuck in a negative loop. I want you to think of five women that you really admire. These women can be famous, influential, from your childhood, or just your own circle of family and friends. Why are these women on this list? What qualities made you think of them? Take a moment to think of it. You may have more and you may only have two or three. Now I want you to make one avatar person based on these five women. Hold her in your mind. Now let me ask you this question. Why are you feeling unworthy? Is it because of what you look like? Is it because your body isn't good enough? Is it because you're getting wrinkled or chubby or you’re feeling like you are not good enough for some other reason? Is it because you're not as successful as you thought you should be? Now let’s bring your top five avatar woman back into the forefront of your mind. Would you eliminate her from being on your list because she isn’t pretty enough? Because she isn’t thin or toned enough? Because she didn't achieve more? If this amazing woman on your list had a bad day and lost her cool with her kids or didn't follow a specific eating plan that kept her trim, would you lose all respect for her and disqualify her from your admiration? I'm guessing not. When I first did this exercise, I was feeling unworthy. I have always tied my worth to what I look like…to my weight specifically. When I looked at the five women on my list, I realized that not one of them made my list because of their size, shape or status. It got me thinking that maybe obsessing about these things is what was keeping me stuck, feeling unworthy and never good enough. Then I had a huge revelation. These women were on my list precisely because they did not obsess over these things. It seemed to me, that they were more preoccupied with helping others, putting goodness out into the world and loving as much as they could. The five women on my list were not generally thin, overly concerned with their looks and did not hold major status by the world standards. What do your five women look like? My guess is, the people in your life who you undoubtedly serve every day would put you on their list of five women. Friends, we are too hard on ourselves. We hold ourselves to a standard we would never hold to other people. There is this beautiful place between harsh judgment of ourselves and loving kindness for ourselves where growth happens. And it probably won't be the growth you are looking for. Once again, let go of what does not serve you! For example: self-hatred and self-loathing. Embrace loving kindness for yourself. You cannot hate yourself into a better position. I had to let go of the idea of having a perfect body. Once I let go of that idea, my life was flooded with goodness that I did not anticipate. My relationship with my amazing husband improved and my friendships also got better. I'm a whole lot more fun to be around now that I'm not doubting myself all the time. Letting go of that idea does not mean that you are giving up. They are not the same thing! I hope that you know, yes, you right there reading this post, that you really are amazing. Please start believing it because the world needs more women who believe they are amazing! I'm going to steal a quote that I heard this morning from Alanis Morissette of all people. She said: "I want to create an environment that the feminine is upheld, honored and supported.” That is my goal for this community in my goal for you specifically.
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